I struggle with doing what I feel God is asking me to do. Sometimes I’ll get it done, but I’ll finish it late (because my heart won’t be in it). Sometimes I’ll just procrastinate to the point where I don’t get it done at all, or sometimes I’ll simply reason my way out of it.
How do I get to the point where I enjoy doing things that I’m supposed to be doing? It rarely seems that I enjoy what God is asking me to do.
To be honest, it seems like the only things that I really enjoy doing are the things that help me procrastinate from what I’m supposed to be doing (what God wants me to do).
Is it better that I struggle with obedience and do it even if it’s unenjoyable? Or should I be or find incredible joy in what I’m supposed to be doing? Am I somehow failing God by plodding through things at times? Is it enough to simply be obedient in the task, or do I need to be more? Should I be incredibly joyful in thanksgiving? Am I dishonoring God by going through the motions? And if that’s true, how do I not go through the motions? How do I be passionate and joyful to His every command?
Maybe I’m not passionate enough because even in my obedience, I do things on my timing instead of God’s timing. I procrastinate because it was difficult last time. If I simply made it more of a habit and didn’t let the dread slow me down, then I wouldn’t have as much of that feeling the next time.
In waiting and drawing it out, I kill the passion that I’m supposed to have. Every time I’m disobedient, every time I say no, every time I put something off, I’m killing the passion again.
There is good news, though. Because every time I’m obedient, and every time I don’t put things off, and every time I follow through, my passion is resurrected.
The key to truly honoring God and the work that He has set before me is by doing that work right when it’s commanded. At first, the passion might not seem like it’s there. It may be boring or feel like you’re pulling teeth. But by continuing on and not allowing yourself to give up, you are instilling in yourself a greater passion the next time you sit down to do that work.