A SELF-INDULGENT SATIRE
The history books will record this time as the age when love finally conquered hate. Joe Biden’s election, the canceling of hate-filled social media sites, traitorous government officials, and pillow salesman (insinuating election fraud) shows this all to be true.
In fact, there may never be a time in history when there has been more hope and more promise on the horizon than there is right now. In time we might even create a federal holiday to celebrate the defeat of he-who-must-not-be-named (think of the 4th of July, without all of the racist nationalism).
For the last several years, Trump and his trolls have espoused their hate speech across the internet, corrupting young and impressionable minds and spreading misinformation. Sites like Parlor were the epitome of this dangerous era. Filled with false information, anger, and hate, they encouraged and instigated the violence that resulted in the capital riots. In a united act of love, the big tech companies banded together to destroy this cancer on the soul of America before it was too late.
It seems Americans have finally come together and realized that the only way to stop hate is to fight against it in every way possible. In love, Delta put some angry Trump supporters on no-fly lists. In love, banks, credit processors, and email lists shut down Trump’s accounts. In love, they canceled Senator Hawley’s book deal. In love, they removed thousands of embittered and angry Trump supporters from Facebook and Twitter in the great purge of the neofascists.
We are living at the dawn of a golden age. In this new age, businesses, government officials, and private citizens have come together. They have recognized a crucial truth. That only by targeting and destroying people with dissenting opinions can love ever win. Only by taking thousands of Trump supporters off Facebook and Twitter can love ever win. It’s only through cancel culture and denying people platforms to voice their free opinions that love can ever win. It’s only by creating blacklists that love can ever win. Only through the systematized and coordinated effort to block Trump supporters of every modern convenience and relationship can love ever win!
We can’t stop here!
We’ve come so far. We should be very proud of what we have accomplished, yet there’s a lot of work ahead. If we aim to destroy people who condone and encourage hate and violence, we can’t stop with just Trump supporters.
For love to truly win, we must go much further. Anyone that believes in election fraud must go, even democrats, as they might insight violence. Anyone who is pro-life must also go because their beliefs drive others to bomb abortion clinics. Anyone that doesn’t support massive gun restrictions must go, for obvious reasons, and anyone that is pro-fossil fuel must go because they’re killing the planet. Anyone who believes the Bible is God’s word must go as well because by simple math that makes them homophobic and sexist. Anyone privileged must go because their very silence is violence. Anyone who watches any news other than CNN or MSNBC is on the list. Anyone who square danced in middle school (also for obvious reasons).
Anyone that knows the words to the Dukes of Hazard Song must be canceled. Anyone that sings the old national anthem or uses plastic straws aren’t safe either. We must eliminate those that refuse to wear a mask, wear one below their nose, or kiss their kids at bedtime. Anyone that has ever said the word yall or believes that charter schools are a good thing. Anyone who eats red meat or has a problem with a drag queen at the library reading their 5-year old stories. They all must go! We must destroy all of these hate-filled, horrible people in the name of love.
We must remove them from social media. We must deplatform them, any websites they own, and any bank accounts they have. If they use cash, we must create a list that restaurants and grocery stores can consult so they can’t buy basic necessities. We must take away everything that they have and make it impossible for them to exist in the modern world.
We must force them to sell everything they have to survive. We must bring them to the lowest low. We must make it impossible for their children to get an education. We must make it impossible for them to get a job. We must put them on lists and declare them mentally disturbed and take away their right to own firearms. We must sue them until their eyes bleed and all they have left are the clothes on their backs as their children cry out with distended bellies.
Love commands us to do these things. If we can ever hope to reach that beautiful point in human history where love finally triumphs over hate, we must do all these things. Because love is not forgiving, it does not show mercy or grace. Love demands justice at all costs. It keeps all records of wrong, demands punishment, demands suffering, demands destruction. Love is unbending.